The Curtain.

I was driving home today from lunch with my mother.  There was nothing out of the ordinary going on.  I was listening to the band Disciple, which has earned a place in my CD collection as the most listened to band while driving (sorry Switchfoot…).  Anyways, I was listening to the song “After the World” (track 7 on Scars Remain).  It’s a powerful song talking about how God loved us before the world began, and will continue to love us after the world is no more.

As I’m driving, we get to the bridge.  The lyrics go like this (keep in mind that it is God speaking here):

Isn’t my life a clear sign?

Since I have crossed over this chasm

To fill the space between me and you

And I will do it all over again

Just look for me, just wait for me.

As the song gets to the part that I bolded, I got this clear image (whether from God directly or from my own mind) or a curtain being ripped in half (it was red and being ripped from top to bottom if you are interested).

My mind is one that’s able to have multiple songs stuck in it at once, and so naturally, I started to sing in my head a song that I can’t find anywhere. The only line that I can remember goes “The curtain is torn in two, so Lord, we run to you.”

Tie these two lines together and you effectively have a conversation between God and Man.

God:  “Isn’t my life a clear sign? Isn’t it clear? Since I crossed over this chasm of sin that separated us? I’ve filled the space between me and you! And I’d do it all again.  I’d die and suffer on the cross. I’d do it for you!”

Man:  “I see that this curtain is torn in two.  There is now no separation between us.  There is now nothing that prevents me from entering the presence of the holy, holy, holy God.  So now, Lord, I run to you!”

 

This dropped me to my knees (only metaphorically though because I was driving).

 

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever ever*! Amen. Ephesians 3:20-21

 

 

 

 

*did you catch the ever ever in the verse? Yup that’s right. God is eternal  :)

Pit Pit

I saw Disciple at Creation Fest this past week. Their guitarists creep me out, but their lead singer has such passion for Christ and music.  He shared with us, before singing After the World, something about Jewish literature.  On the web, we use bold, italics, and capital letters to emphasize a point.  Hebrew authors would use a word twice.  For example, someone can fall into a pit, or they can fall into a pit pit.  If you fall into a pit, you’re in trouble, but if you fall into a pit pit, you’re in trouble trouble.

We serve a holy God.  He is holy.

But, not only is he holy, he is also holy, holy. He is a whole lot of holy.

To top it off though, not only is he holy, holy, but he is Holy, Holy, Holy.

 

Imagine a really big pit. The biggest pit that you can.  So big that it’s a pit pit.

 

Got that in your head?

 

Ok. Make it bigger.

 

Imagine something that is holy, holy

Now make it even more holy.

 

Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God almighty. Who was and is and is to come.

God is big!

Like really, really big. When I say big, I don't just mean big like an elephant, or a mountain, I mean, God is huge! This eventually gets to that point, so hang on with me.

I was at my normal Tuesday night church functions. The college ministry, Relucent, was at 5. Our speaker was out of town, his mom got diagnosed with Leukemia, and needed to go take care of her and his father. He left Tuesday morning, and we met Tuesday evening. Not much time to get stuff planned (I'm the glue that God uses to keep the group functioning). So, naturally, we had a great time of extended worship and told shared with each other what God was doing in our lives. It was a great time, seeing what God has been doing to individuals in the community, as well as how God had been using the community to teach, serve, and stretch the members of our community.

After Relucent meets, we eat dinner and then the High School group meets, Illuminate. Same story, Steve wasn't going to be here, so Andy made the decision to watch a filmed message by Louis Giglio called How Great is our God. Watch it. Youtube has it in 5 parts and it is totally worth the time. It is a discussion of how big our God really is (spoiler alert: God is really really big).

This movie is currently in the process of changing my life, and the way that I view God, so for those of you who, for one reason or another, decide not to take my advice and watch the film, here is the premise of the film:

1. Stars are really big
2. We are really small
   
3. God breathed out the stars
4. God breathed life into us
   
5. Therefore, God is really really big
6. And we are really really small
   
7. Yet, God loves us each individually!!!!
8. Really really big God loves really really small me, and knows me better than myself

It is then with this thought that we are to approach God. The God who is really big, big enough to know me better than I know myself.

Moving this in a different direction:

I have had some anxiety problems in the past. Freshman year, I had a breakdown dead week of my first quarter of college. I was working on a paper in the computer lab of my dorm, and at about 1 or 2 in the morning, I started hyperventilating and shaking. I decided that it was time to go to bed, so i took the elevator down to my room, and barely made it into bed before collapsing. I went to the Student Health Center and they thought that I had mono. They performed some blood tests and said that they'd get back to me later. Final diagnosis was "Stress Induced Illness."

Fast forward one and a half years:

My mentor for the past few years is getting ready to leave for Zambia to become a Missionary, teaching pastors. We're all (Relucent) sitting around in his backyard for a barbecue. He gathers us up in a circle, and after some worship, we sit on the grass and he begins to deliver his last message to the group. This was his "if there is anything that you remember from what I've taught, it's this" kind of message. It revolved around Philippians 4:6-7 with a specific emphasis on thanksgiving.

When we are anxious about stuff, we'll often ask God to make it better. We'll pray to God, asking for Him to save us from whatever it is that is troubling us. But this misses an important part of what Paul wrote. "by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving."

It is so important that we give thanks to God for what he has already done in our life. I don't know for sure why God wants us to thank Him. After all, he already knows our hearts. But, one thing that I do know, is that it is good to thank God for what He has done. It refocuses our hearts and minds on what really matters, God. When we thank God for what he has done in the past, it allows us to recognize that God is indeed there for us, and will continue to be there for us forever!

Now, let's bring this back to the Loius Giglio film. God is really really big, right? We are really small, right? Yet, God still knows every hair on our heads, and calls us individually, by name, into relationship with Him. How much more important are we, than the sparrows or the lilies?

And our God, who has always been faithful in the past, who is big enough to take care of us, who knows each one of our problems, will take care of us!

I'm graduating real soon.  I don't think I've had classes harder than what I have right now (well, one of them at least...).  This change of perspective has come at the point that I needed it the most.  Now, when I realize that the exam I thought was on Thursday is really Tuesday, I still know that God knows what I'm going through, and he has always saved me from despair, even when I don't deserve it.  God is a good father.  He knows what I need, and how to shape me into the man that He wants me to be.

God, I welcome your shaping.  Mold me into a man of your image.  Help me to recognize how big you are, and how intimate you are.  Father, You alone are worthy of my praise.  Thank you for helping me through all of these situations that I get myself into.  Thank you for working through me, in spite of what I do.

Experience is Knowledge

Anyone ever hear the phrase "Experience is Knowledge?" It's this idea that you can know facts about something, but until you actually walk out the door, you don't actually know anything. As long as you aren't willing to actually experience that which you've studied, why bother?

I graduate from college in less than a month. At the end of it, I get to dive head first into the world of "Experience." I just got a job offer, about a couple of months ago, to go into full time ministry for a year, through Youth Encounter. I get to travel around the US for eight months, and in the middle of that time, we're flying to Denmark for four months.

Basically, I get to live like a minstrel for a year, moving from city to city, house to house, playing music, spreading the gospel. I get to live out of a van with 5-7 people, living off of the hospitality of others, living in their houses, on their couches, eating at their dinner table.

Long story short, it is the experience of a life time, using gifts that God has given me, in order to advance the gospel!

What are you doing with the gifts that God has given you?  For many of us, right now we are called to be full time students or full time workers.  How are you using your school or job or extended vacation (as you search for a job) to advance the kingdom?

Students and workers have an amazing mission field that they live in everyday.  Classes are a great way to get to know people and share with them. Offices open up the door for relationships.  God has places each and every one of us right where we are for a very specific reason, and without looking into each individuals calling, there is one calling that we all share, and that is to go make disciples.  So go do it!

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed...
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but then I realize that the only thing that I should be overwhelmed with is Gods grace because He loves me and never puts me in situations that I can't handle (with his help)

No, my strength comes from God... whether or not I choose to recognize it.

At the end of the day, where do you turn?
As the rise of the sun, where do you look?
When the world falls around you, what holds you up?
When there seems to be no hope, what gives you peace?

Psalm 121 (The Message)

A Pilgrim Song

1-2 I look up to the mountains; does my strength come from mountains?
No, my strength comes from God,
who made heaven, and earth, and mountains.

3-4 He won't let you stumble,
your Guardian God won't fall asleep.
Not on your life! Israel's
Guardian will never doze or sleep.

5-6 God's your Guardian,
right at your side to protect you—
Shielding you from sunstroke,
sheltering you from moonstroke.

7-8 God guards you from every evil,
he guards your very life.
He guards you when you leave and when you return,
he guards you now, he guards you always.


This for me is more of a confession than anything. How often do I look to my friends, or my guitar, or my computer, or the internet, or anything else before turning to God? God should be the first thing that I turn to, not my last resort. I need Him more than I need anything else, and yet I turn to everything else before I turn to Him.

God, the all powerful, the almighty, the creator of the universe, my last resort.

Help me to be like you, Jesus. Help me to turn to the Father for all aspects of my life. Help me to come to Christ with the good things and the bad. Help me lean fully on You.

My Story

I'm working on filling out an application and it asked me a simple question:

Describe your faith journey. Who or what has influenced and inspired your faith?

It took me quite a while to think and write down what I thought was important, so I figured I'd post it here as well.

I was baptized and raised in the Lutheran church, but for most youth, that doesn’t mean much. It wasn’t until seventh grade that I actually began to witness the works of the Lord. We were on a weeklong missions survey in downtown Seattle, where we did different service projects throughout Seattle. The last night of this trip, we invited a bunch of people from the community to a worship service at the church we were staying at. That night, something about the message and seeing people from so many different walks of life worshipping together made me realize that God accepts us as we are, where we are, and that he loves us regardless of what we’ve done. This is when I gave my heart to Christ. I still wasn’t fully sold out to God though. I refused to recognize that God is in charge of my life, and that he is sovereign over all creation.

My final year of high school, I had a girlfriend. We decided to go to the same college so that we wouldn’t have to deal with long distance relationships, but then ended up breaking up even before graduating from high school. She hurt me a lot, and I couldn’t see how a god that loved me would allow me to go through such pains, and why he would allow me to be in a relationship that would hurt so badly once it was over. It is still painful to this day, even though I now know why it was that God allowed me to feel the pain.

Because of this event, I ended up going to Western Washington University (WWU). This is where God would fully reveal his power and grace to me, and show me His love through the community of Christ. When I arrived at WWU, I found out that my next door neighbor was a friend from high school who was a believer. Within the first couple of days, two college students came to our doors and invited us to join them for a night of worship with some other Christians in our dorm. After that night, they invited us to come to Friday Night Fellowship with Campus Christian Fellowship (CCF) and to join them for a bible study called Core. Not knowing what I was getting myself into, I joined a brotherhood that would change my life for ever.

In Core, I met men whom I can always turn to for guidance, comfort, accountability, and wisdom. Through this bible study, it was revealed to me that, though I am saved by grace, and grace alone, we are saved by grace to do good works. There is more to being a Christ follower than just attending a bible study, or going to church once a week. Being a follower of Christ is a life style. One night, while walking a friend back to her dorm late at night, I started talking to God. He revealed to me that though I was saved, I wasn’t being effective for the Kingdom. That night, I sat down on a brick ledge and told God that I was going to change. I was going to live my life for His glory and purpose, not my own. I surrendered my life and my actions to Him. A part of that was the decision to lead a Core for the next two years.